Friday, April 24, 2009

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep

the film version of this famous book is Blade Runner, which is my favourite film ever.

but as is said, the book and the film is in fact quite different in many aspect other than the general background. i think the most obvious and significant difference is (not the plots but) the theme expressed.

i love the film though it is depressive, i love the book more because it is even more depressive. (and maybe i just love depressive stuffs which finally leads to my depression - -.) we will not forget the words roy baty said in the film:
all those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain, time to die.

and when i checked the 1982 version, i found that rick deckard did have a comment on it:
he took all the time he had as though he loved life very much. every second of
it, even the pain. then he was dead.

i decide this is what the film wants to say, the love to life, to the life we have, or had. it must be heartbreaking that you realised that you are a replicant and only have four year to live, and it must be even more heartbreaking that you have the emotion to feel the heartbreaking feelings. perhaps it is correct that replicants should not have emotion, they shouldn't be able to love. it is not cruel, because without emotion, cruel is nothing.

and in the book, things are getting worse. the characters inside seem more cryptic, i cannot really think of the personality of every single character. and worse, they themselves cannot, either. the way of 'recognise that you're alive' is meaningless. even rick deckard could not be sure that he was human but not a humanoid android. and the rachel was not the good girl in the film. she did something humanoid, she seemed to have humanoid emotion, but everything was faked. every single thing in the book was faked, electric, and getting worse even. androids could only live for four years, because of the problem of cell replacement, not the evil purposes of human beings.

PDK really did a great job. he seems to focus more on the essence of an entity. do androids have soul? do they think and love as human? do they dream? and do they have the emotion of sympathy towards the living creatures? we never know. i cannot know weather they loved life or not. maybe they did, maybe not. but one thing i am sure is that they do have their own 'free will' and, in other words, they have their 'souls'. but are these souls the same as the ones belong to human beings? are electric animals still animals?

isn't it much more depressive to doubt your existence than losing your life? i say yes. and this is the reason why i love the book even more than the film.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

depression

i wanna dial for happiness. and not going to take any drugs.

Friday, April 17, 2009

The Song of The Earth

though i cant say im really a fan of classical, but, i really do like classical. but what i like are not really classical, they were mostly composed in the 20th century.

The Song of The Earth, composed by Mahler, is my favourite at the moment. i listened to 4 different version of it, and strongly impressed by Bernstein's version. if im asked to choose the best dicrector for Mahler's work, i definitely choose Bernstein.

the lyrics are so sad, really, i love them more than the original (Chinese) ones. and Mahler's words about 'home' at the end of whole song are really really impressive!

next month Penderecki's coming to Guangzhou. i cant say i like him, cuz Threnody for the Victims of Hiroshima is really HORRIBLE. i cant even say i like modernism, in literature or music, they are just a little bit 'over'. but decided to go anyway, cuz, a) he directs, himself and b)i knew him from high school music lesson and it will be very strange to see a guy from the book come out and give performance. anyway, most important is that i thought he was dead....

and as long as im alive i will never be happy

but it doesnt mean i will do anything to stop my life.
it is so temporary that i can only be cheered up by Mahler at the moment.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

fucked part.2

i wont say the word fuck because once i say it im fucked.

it is not because i cant it is because i just wont.

Monday, April 6, 2009

i wanna go back

真想回到过去的日子
如果可以再次选择

如果
在漂泊以后
我可以回家
那就不需要再离开
我就真的不会再离开
永远……永远
永远

Sunday, March 29, 2009

自私

就是这么幼稚的自私,你控制不了的。因为你天生如此。